Sharks in the Pool

I wrote about this previously, but it was before I had a full understanding of the extent of my OCD and how it impacts my life. And it's funny so it bears repeating.

Probably one of my DUMBEST and most long-standing obsessions is swimming alone in a pool and worrying about being attacked by a shark. I KNOW. So dumb! But I have worried about this since...forever. If there are many people in a pool, I'm good, because duh, a shark wouldn't come into a pool with so many people. Why? No clue. But that's the rule. But if it's just me, or maybe one or two other people in the pool...paranoia. I check the pool obsessively to make sure a shark isn't sneaking up on me.

How would the shark get into the pool? The drains, duh. When I was younger and lived in Santa Cruz that seemed sort of plausible. They would swim from the ocean into a pipe that was in the sea, would swim up the pipe and pop out into the pool I was swimming in. Obviously. Once we moved to Indiana all quasi-rational explanations for how the sharks would get into the pipes was gone. But OCD isn't rational and doesn't need no stinking explanations so I just kept on believing I'd be attacked by a shark if I was alone in the pool.

I think this obsession stems from Jaws. I love the entire Jaws franchise, but watching Jaws in childhood apparently altered my brain permanently. I also went on the Jaws ride at Universal Studios when I was a kid and my parents didn't know I would be on the side exactly where the animatronic Jaws would come out to attack our boat. I about died when that happened. When I picture the shark that's going to attack me, it always looks like Jaws.

I also worry about sharks at the beach. But that's sort of normal-ish. Many people worry about sharks at the beach. Probably not as much as me, but I don't feel too weird about it.  

I turn 35 in less than a month and last week I was swimming alone at the pool at the gym and I was still worried a shark was going to attack me. This shit is ridiculous. But alas, here it is.

Sharks!

I simultaneously love sharks (though not as much as unicorns) and am absolutely terrified by them. At one point in my life I thought I wanted to be a marine biologist and I wanted to specialize in sharks. Then I realized I lived in Indiana and that was probably unrealistic. Oh well. But I can still pretty much watch any show about sharks and be entertained for hours.

On the other hand, I am absolutely terrified of getting attacked by a shark. I blame JAWS. I watched Jaws at a young age and it has pretty much scarred me for life. Way to go DAD (he always let me watch inappropriate-for-my-age shows). Life in sunny California was never the same. For months after seeing Jaws I wouldn't even go into the water past my ankles. I was sure that Jaws was just ready to attack me and chew me up into a million bloody pieces. I've since moved past the ankle deep waters again but I am still 99.9% sure that I am going to be attacked by a shark every time I'm in the ocean. 

I shared this a month or so ago on Facebook but I also have an irrational fear of being attacked by a shark while swimming alone in pools. I KNOW IT MAKES NO SENSE. But still? Totally freak myself out when swimming alone. I just worry that they will somehow figure out how to navigate the water/sewer system and will be hiding in the drains waiting to pop out and chomp me to death while I casually swim laps. Yes, I know that sharks can't live in chlorine and that there is not a nice neat system of pipes that go from ocean to LA Fitness pool and that the sharks I am imagining are much larger than the drains in the pool. That's why it's called irrational. And I admit that it's dumb. And I try really hard not to get scared but it still happens. C'est la vie.